The exercise was to visit Cot’s Baseball Contracts
website, take a look at each position need, and determine who’s worth
spending time and energy on.  The assumption here is that
everyone who’s on the Mets’ case for having deep pockets and a shallow
farm pool are correct, and that it would be better to spend money than
trade prospects.

Better Know A First Baseman: Nomar Garciaparra

Nomar Garciaparra?  There must be some mistake.

Oh, indeed there is. 

I’d intended to place Garciaparra on the list of “first baseman” who’d have to ship me to Abu Dhabi before I’d accept them as a productive member of the Mets.  I jotted the list down last Sunday night, and I suppose in my addled state missed Garciaparra.  I didn’t think about it on Monday; I was too busy trying–and failing–to reconstruct the Ross Gload trade from memory, while being jostled by my subway seatmate with the large bags and bad perfume. 

When I took my usual ten-minute bagel break at work, I wrapped up the Gload business, formatted the post, and threw it up.

Speaking of ten minutes and throwing up: I attempted just now to talk myself into Nomar Garciaparra the way I successfully talked myself into Carlos Delgado and, to a somewhat lesser extent, talked myself into Russell Branyan.

Not happening.

Garciaparra’s not had more than two hundred plate appearances in two seasons.  He’s three full seasons removed from his renaissance in Los Angeles.  He shows no home run consistency–and if you flash back to the Branyan discussion, home runs are really the point here.  He didn’t record an error last year… in the sixteen games he played at first base.

Yes.

Here are some things I’d rather see happen than Nomar Garciaparra signing with the Mets:

  • Oliver Perez signing a contract extension;
  • an executive order declaring my name be changed to Stacy McGillicutty;
  • the network television return of Stacked;
  • Republican-style health care reform.

I think that’s about all the time I’ll waste on that.  I’m hungry, and Nomar’s gotta start looking for next-phase baseball jobs: coaching; scouting; lawn trimming.