Got a comment from “daled@optonline.net” that I didn’t see until today:
A new comment has been posted on your blog Section Five Twenty-Eight, on entry #1252431 (One Hundred And One Things You Didn’t Know About John Olerud: Part One).
You’re an idiot
Commenter name: daled@optonline.net
Commenter email address: daled@optonline.net
Commenter URL:
Commenter IP address: 69.123.221.94
Now, Dale from Oceanside, NY–ran a search on the IP address–is correct. I am an idiot. I’ve known for some time. As a matter of fact, I declared as much to my fellow college seniors during our graduation dinner. “I will graduate Bennington College in five days, secure in the knowledge that I am an idiot.” There’s tape of this.
I figure part of what led Dale to call me an idiot is all this list-making, and while I won’t stop making the list (unless the Mets or John Olerud give me a call, but really, I feel it’s quite complimentary), I will refrain from listing the reasons why I’m an idiot.
What I will do is offer the same explanation I offered those at Bennington: I’m an idiot because I don’t know much about much. I know how to write a screenplay; I’ve got that locked down. I know how to perform various administrative tasks, ranging from the mundane to the complex and intricate.
Contrary to popular belief, I know when to keep my mouth shut. Some who know me well might disagree strongly. Reality is I speak up in those moments when waiting will just be too tedious.
Your blogger knows how to play the flute and the harmonica. He also knows the lyrics to hundreds of songs, including Foreigner’s “Cold As Ice.”
But there’s a whole world I don’t know about and can’t access. Sabermetrics? No dice. I really want to understand it, though. I have no idea what got into Hideki Kuroda last night, and I sort of don’t want to know–whatever he’s got, I don’t wanna catch. I read and watched the saga of Jose Reyes, and I feel like an idiot because while I think I know what went on, I can’t say for certain.
This is becoming a list, and I promised I wouldn’t start listing. Let’s just leave it at I don’t know much about much.
The beauty, as I explained to my fellow morons five and a half years ago, is that we can rely on each other to solve our idiocy. While I still don’t want to know much about Kuroda and whatever his problem is, I can speak with others and come to an understanding of why one doctor said Reyes tore a tendon and another doctor said it was just the effect of a rough night of voodoo. I can certainly seek out reference material drafted by bright, incisive minds, and come to understand how UZR is computed.
Note that I said “solve our idiocy.” For as much as I’m an idiot, I’ll put dollars to doughnuts on the probability that Dale from Oceanside is a Class-A Fool as well. The difference between us is some nuanced level of self-control–see comment left with little supporting data. Perhaps it’s more incomplete or short-sighted than dumb to leave such a criticism without defending it, but this is a blog whose mission is to make me feel better, not provide much at all in the way of probing analysis. Really, my point here is: why split hairs?
I don’t know what I can teach others about baseball besides the rules and some anecdotal history. I’m compelled, in a search for more pervasive idiocy, to take a look at some of the things I’ve advocated: a Mets video program to coexist with a museum; the hiring of a sharp, savvy communications director to be the public face of the business; the nixing of sponsored fan giveaways in exchange for sponsored reductions in ticket prices. I imagine this’ll happen during the off-season as well.
I’m still flummoxed by Kuroda, really. How do you… well. They can’t all be winners. But stating that is, in part, what led to my being called an idiot in the first place.
Kudos, Dale. Keep callin’ ’em as you see ’em.