Too much to say.  Not enough time to say it.

Of course, I’d be better off if I wasn’t compulsively watching episodes of the failed series Commander In Chief online.  That show’s like watching an off-brand toy train wreck.  It’s fun to see Rod Lurie’s fake West Wing–complete with aping of Martin Sheen’s back-to-the-camera pose, Photoshopped a gauzy monochrome–completely derail and threaten to spoil the entire Eastern seaboard with light sweet crude.  But I’d much rather be playing with my Legos, and I don’t know why I can’t pull away.

But I don’t.  I watch in one window and read the news in another.  And sometimes, things I read get to me.

Sometimes, they REALLY get to me

Forget the Mets history.  Jerry Koosman is sixty-six years old.  He served in the military.  But he cost the United States $80,000, according to the judge.  So the hell what?

Know what the United States’ gross domestic product was in 2008?  $14.3 TRILLION. 

When you try to determine what percentage $80K is of $14.3 trillion, your calculator breaks.

He’d paid back the taxes.  He’d apologized.  He’d shown remorse. 

And something tells me Koos isn’t exactly living high on the hog, wasting his nonexistent billions on Cristal to pour over buxom women in swimsuits, and inground pools in the shape of a hand giving the finger.

What gets to me, though–what REALLY gets to me–is this part of the report:

“The judge scolded Koosman for taking advantage of all the opportunities
the United States offered him, including the chance to play major
league baseball and win a World Series, then walking away without

Excuse me while I spit. 

The U.S. ain’t gave Jerry Koosman nothin’, as My Sister would say.  Jerry Koosman and Joan Whitney Payson are responsible for the opportunities Koos took.  And given the care with which the system has, I’m sure, investigated the matter, let the record show that he was delinquent for three years beginning in 2002.  He pitched his last game on August 21st, 1985.

So unless their investigation was crap-poor, it seems to me he paid his taxes for another sixteen years before getting snookered by the morons who preach this “you don’t have to pay taxes” nonsense.

I fully comprehend that laws are applied so that others will be less inclined to break the law.  But when a man named Jerry Koosman–whom I know and a lot of Mets fans know but few others may know if you stopped them on the street and asked–has made restitution and apologized, you figure out a way to keep him OUT of prison.

You don’t fake leniency by only sentencing him to half of what the guidelines recommend, you don’t falsely frame his service to his fans and country, and you sure as hell don’t try to make an example of a man who’s by no means the face of a stupefyingly ridiculous movement.

He’s Jerry Goddamn Koosman.  Not Wesley Snipes.

And Wesley Snipes is still free on bail, pending his appeal.

U.S. District Court Judge Barbara Crabb?  Way to pick some low-hanging fruit.  You reek.


I have more to say about other things, but I want this to stand for awhile.  I’m outraged.